• Brie

Sexually Abused as a Child

In line with the series, we'll call this one "Storytime of how I was sexually harassed at the age of 11".

I can vividly remember my childhood and some of the experiences attached to it. Growing up as a girl was pretty challenging but one experience in particular stood out from the rest. My experience with 'Big daddy' , a man known to everyone to be very philanthropic ultimately changed my life. The memory cannot be erased, no matter how many times I try to forget and the older I get the more traumatic the memories become, especially because of the caliber of man involved.

So it all started on a day I got back from school earlier than usual and my parents weren't home. I decided to take a stroll with a couple friends, after a while outside someone called me and told me that Big daddy wanted to send me on an errand. Looking back at it now, I wonder if the person who called me to meet Big daddy that day knew what was really going on. Any way, as young and naïve as I was I went to meet with Big daddy alone for the errand but it turned out to be something else. Keep in mind that he was over 50yrs and I was just 11yrs old at that time, so I didn't know what it felt like to be sexually abused. He fondled with several parts of my body and I took it to be normal considering that it was coming from a man his age. On several occasions he would call for me and continue to sexually harass me, he even made me promise not to tell anyone at that time, it was supposed to be "our little secret". It started becoming more and more frequent even though I had began to tell him that I wasn't comfortable with what he was doing to me.

Finally my mom noticed that it was odd that Big daddy was always calling me and then warned me never to visit him or go to his house when I was called over, she told me to tell anyone who came to call me for Big daddy that I wasn't allowed to go on any errands she didn't send me on.

I honestly don't know what would have happened if my mom hadn't stepped in when she did. He might have possibly graduated from just sexually harassing me to having sexual intercourse with me. Growing up now, past my teenage years I've come to realize that what Big daddy did to me was a grave offense, an offense of the highest order to me as a girl-child, all because I was naïve and voiceless. I struggle everyday to forgive him and myself for these experiences that have refused to be forgotten and erased from my memory.

I will forever be grateful to my mother on the other hand for standing up for me even when I didn't know I needed help.

I hope sharing this experience of mine helps to educate and encourage someone who might be facing what I went through. My advice is that you confide in someone, your parents or your friends, do not keep it a secret, speak out and tell someone before it's too late.

-Story from Anonymous

©2020 by Girls Voices Lagos.